Not even close to the same, but a similarity...

A friend of mine, who had a child die 4yrs ago, and I were talking one day about how "our" stuff is so important to us, yet others don't give it another thought and how we need to not be offended and/or let that get us down. What he spoke of specifically was it was the anniversary of their son's birth. He would have been 9. For everyone else, it was just another day on the calendar. Nobody meant anything bad by not noting it. I made it a point to send both he and his wife an e-mail on the anniversary day of B's passing. I'll have to make a note to send them a message next time his b-day rolls around. Something simple like, "I'm thinking of you today" is all.

The burr in my saddle that is similar, but nowhere near the same is my up-coming foot surgery. I was in the hospital once as a child (measles or mumps or bronchial pneumonia or something...I was about 4 or 5, so I really don't have much recollection of it); then I was in the hospital in 1995 with false labor brought on by being dehydrated, and then two weeks later with REAL labor! Two years ago I had a colonoscopy, but that wasn't in the hospital. A nasty procedure for sure, but something that was only a memory the very next day. What's been "cooking" for a little over a month now, is me going in for an out-patient surgical procedure on Thursday (Mortons Neuroma in my left foot). The healing time is 4-16 weeks. Doc can't give me better than that cuz he's gotta cover his arse to make sure I don't think I'm better in 2 weeks then go out and do something I shouldn't! Tomorrow I go for a pre-op appointment. I think the only question I have after, "did you get my insurance company to sign off on this?", and "should I go get any 'scrips filled now so it doesn't have to be done on Thursday?" will be, "how have others felt, socially, post-op?"

I want to know cuz NOBODY seems to remember that I'm going in to have my foot sliced open on Thursday. Oh, sure, my dad did. He wants to come over the next day and bring pizza and cake (two days after my surgery is DH's b-day). I told him I'd have DH call him that morning and tell him how I'm feeling. I honestly think I'll feel like sleeping and NOT entertaining. MIL called an hour ago and left a message asking if we wanted to go to their house for dinner on DH's b-day. WTF? I'm gonna have my foot in a boot, can't get it wet (so showering will have to be with a garbage bag on), and I'll be relying on crutches to keep me mobile enough to just get to the bathroom. Doc says I can't go to work for at least 7-10 days.

I've been working in the direction of tending to things that will drive me insane whilst on the couch or in bed. Cobwebs are down, silk greenery went thru the washing machine the other day, kitchen cuboards/woodwork has been scrubbed clean. I've got some magazines collected, and on my 'to do' list is to get little projects that I can do at the table with my foot propped on a chair. I've even figured out how I can make carmelitas for Thanksgiving if that is what Cousin wants us to bring. I've also decided that going to her place is better than having everyone all here (which was my first thought). They live 20 minutes away and I can have someone drive me home if I've had enough before the festivities are done. What I dread about that, however, is the attention that will be drawn to me. I'd like to just be invisible.

So, while it really can't be compared to my friends losing their son, it just validates that as humans we mostly are only concerned with that which directly effects us.

I'm hoping for some good meds.